Aug 6, 2011

Happy Birthday to me :)

A wise man once told me, “You can claim to live by your own rules, all you want, but the real challenge is in going out of your own comfort zone, not others’”. So there I was, fidgeting about, waiting for the clock to strike ‘nerves hour’, asking myself to ‘Stop it!’ - and back to step one. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and barley had time to register my change in expression to mocking laughter, before I was back at uncertainty, just as I heard the doorbell go off. “Well”, I said to myself, “This is as good as it’s gonna get” and headed out.

Being greeted with that familiar warm smile helped the nerves some.

“Door, huh? Nice touch. I expected a car honk.”

I wanted to do this right

“So are my flowers in the car?”

Nah, even I couldn’t get away with that

We headed to a nice restaurant and over a leisurely, wonderful meal (and dessert that gave me a peek onto what heaven might feel like), we ate, laughed and talked. It was nothing new, and yet nothing that we had ever done before. In contrast to my nerves earlier, I was starting to wonder now, Why hadn’t we don’t this before? But there’d be time for that later. I would obviously be spending a lot of time going over tonight in my mind; for now, I wanted to merely enjoy the moment and build up on memories.

Far too soon, in my opinion, we were done with dinner and walking back towards the car. And even with the contended sigh that I got into the car with, I almost wished we weren’t here already. Registering who I was with, I realized I could actually say it out loud and I did.

I thought you’d never ask” he smiled. “If it’s not too late, we could walk”.

When we stopped at a beach, I couldn’t help but smile. You could leave some things to fate, but knowing for sure what someone would like, comes with familiarity over time. And I was loving all the attention to detail. It was past the time tourists thronged the place, even past the time the creepies decided to take a walk. Now, there were just a few people around, minding their own business, enjoying the peace and quiet. After a few minutes of walking in comfortable silence, I felt his hand reach mine.

Did you have fun tonight?

“Yes, I did”

I thought so; you can’t seem to shake that smile off your face.”

“Neither can you”

I had to ask what had been on my mind for along time now. “Why now?”

Why anything, you know? Maybe because I just found the guts to ask you now. Mostly because it felt right, now. Any other time, might not have gone well, with either of us

I knew what he was talking about. “Maybe it would have been better”

No, I think we needed that stuff. We might be more cautious now. But that will make us value this more. I know that’s how it is for me

“I’m not sure. I don’t…”

That’s fine. I’ve been here a little longer than you have. I don’t mind waiting for you to catch up. Just as long as you don’t try to needlessly complicate this into something that it isn’t

What is on your mind”, he asked, and I realized I had been quiet for the past few minutes. A few minutes, a lot more steps, faint footprints in the sand, that would be gone with the next slight breeze, or wave that washed over them.

“Just thinking”. Answering his questioning glance, I said “About how well we know each other. And how simple this seems. And I can’t even remember the first time I met you. I normally do”

Not everything has to be dramatic you know. You don’t have to hate or love a person when you first see them. They don’t have to make gallant efforts to get to the other side of that. Not everyone needs to have a song” I smiled at his last statement.

“That’s right actually. In fact we’ve been almost boring. We didn’t turn into best friends overnight, nor did I try to kill you. No one warned me to stay away from you”.

No one forced us together either

“No they didn’t, and yet here we are.”

“I’ve probably never said this, but you are a nice person”

Nope, never said it before

”You know what I mean, I don’t want that to change”

Don’t. Don’t over analyse. Be impulsive. If tonight was fun, just enjoy it. Don’t worry about tomorrow

A little reassured, we walked on, and even as I debated if our new found relationship could handle it, he said it himself, “that last bit should probably be left for when I am drunk” and we broke into laughter. With that, we were back to ‘normal’.

Just then, it started to rain, drizzles to big drops, to rain. We half ran, half laughed to the car, and as soon as we were locked in, he said, “I know you love it, but I don’t think either of us were dressed to get drenched tonight.” Then, in the light, noticing that we were splattered anyway, I laughed,”The best of both worlds!”

The journey back home, was mostly spent listening to and discussing music. The rain had gotten fiercer and noisier, and as always I was enthralled with the windshield getting covered with water drops, and the wiper swishing it away. Since before I could remember, I could watch this for ages.

Alas, as all things must, the journey ended and I was back behind the door where tonight started. We said our goodbyes, and I waited to see him take off and shut the door. A few minutes later, I was back in front of the same mirror, and this time all I could see was the smile that I still couldn’t shake off.

I heard the phone ring, and rolling my eyes thinking it would be one my friends calling to wish me, I felt the smile grow even wider when I saw who it really was.

So, what is my song?

“I thought you’d never ask”


Sometimes, all you need is one chance, to confirm what you've really known all along :-)

Note: To start with, happy birthday to me :-)

24 years, and while the world still hasn’t made much sense to me yet, ringing in a new year this year hasn’t been very scary.

P.S: I meant to title this post, 'Every song is...'


Song Recommendation: None, because I have too many to fit this post in my mind right now. But also because sometimes, you have to “make your own kind of music”


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THE WORK POSTED ON THIS BLOG IS THE RESULT OF AN IMAGINATIVE (I LIKE TO CALL IT CREATIVE), MAINLY INSOMNIAC MIND. THE WORK IS ORIGINAL UNLESS OTHERWISE STATED (EXCLUDING THE POPULAR QUOTES). ALL CHARACTERS APPEARING IN THIS WORK MAY OR MAY NOT BE FICTITIOUS. ANY RESEMBLANCE TO ANY PERSONS LIVING OR DEAD, MAY OR MAY NOT BE PURELY CO-INCIDENTAL, BUT IS MAINLY INTENTIONAL. SUE ME ALL YOU WANT, I GOT NO MONEY ANYWAY!